How do you know if you should continue dating someone?
If you aren’t feeling good about the relationship and you’ve only been on one or two dates, it can be difficult to determine whether you should continue dating someone or if you should cut your loses.
And even if you’ve been in a relationship for a while, it’s never too late to end something that does not serve you in a positive way.
On one hand, you want to give the guy a fair shot and on the other hand, you know you aren’t getting everything you want and you may even be making compromises to date him.
It can even feel like you’re forcing it because you want it to work, because you don’t want to make the mistake of losing a great guy or you just like the company of another human being on the weekends (hey, it happens :-)).
Let’s discuss for a moment the power of women’s intuition. Often times that little voice in our head that tells us that something isn’t quite right, is what we should listen to in order to avoid relationship disaster. But we have to be careful not to let that voice run awry, because leaving your guard up could cause you to lose a great man.
So to help you, I’ve put together five signs that signal that you should cut your losses early and stop dating him:
1. Your Intuition Tells You That Something Is Wrong.
You want to find him charming, and you want to move forward, but your intuition is telling you no. Most of the time women tend to have good intuition, so follow your instincts.
Although you may want commitment, you shouldn’t have to force it or ignore possible warning signs. Even if he looks good on paper, chances are that if your gut says that he’s not a good candidate, then your hunch is probably right.
But you want to also be careful that you aren’t confusing your good hunch with preconceived notions or impossible to meet high standards.
2. Something Seems “Off” About Him, Though You Can’t Put Your Finger On It.
You were set up with him by a good friend. He is everything that you are looking for in a man; he truly seems like Prince Charming in theory. In practice though, you get a weird suspicion about him and wonder what it’s all about.
This ties into intuition and your feelings often being a good indicator. You want to believe that you can move things forward, but something just seems off about him.
He may have a criminal background that you don’t know about. It may be something much simpler, such as he has a fear of commitment. If something about him just doesn’t add up or if it strikes you as odd, then move away from the situation.
Especially if you catch him lying about something that there is no reason to lie about like him telling you he is best friends with a member of your favorite music group. Or lying about important info, such as him being married or having kids.
There may be some exaggeration during the first dates to impress, but habitual liars should not be trusted.
3. You Aren’t Feeling The Chemistry Or Even A Spark.
Some will say that chemistry can grow in time. If,however, you feel absolutely no romantic connection at the beginning, then that can be a warning sign.
You may feel as though you can grow to love him or to feel attracted to him, but is that realistic?
Do you want to force yourself to feel something that should just come naturally?
There should be some connection, some chemistry or some sort of spark that comes about without trying. If you feel absolutely nothing, then perhaps he is just not a good match for you.
And even if you don’t feel that spark at first, during the first couple of dates, through conversation, that should change very quickly.
But if after speaking with him, you get even more disgusted. Let it go. You deserve to be with someone you are attracted to.
4. You Want Different Things.
Within minutes of a first date, you can tell a lot about somebody. You may even be able to tell some fundamental personality traits that are key to his identity.
If he states that he doesn’t want children, for example,and you do, then this is not a good match. But be careful not to mistake his not wanting kids at this moment for him not wanting kids at all.
If he doesn’t seem close to his family or understands why people are, then you may feel the urge to stop dating him, if you are really close to your family. You will want to date someone who values family too because it’s important during family gatherings that he gives your family respect.
If you can see that fundamentally you are very different or that you want different things out of life or your future, then keep away from future dates.
Remember, you never really change somebody!
Don’t confuse this with different interests. You can still have a loving and healthy relationship with someone who enjoys different things than you do.
5. His Personality Or Characteristics Are Less Than You Want; Never Settle.
Some women want a relationship and commitment so bad that they will do anything to get it. Don’t be the woman who settles or compromises what you want, you will always question yourself and him and this will ultimately lead to strife in the relationship.
Sure, you have to have a realistic view of the man that you want to be with, but you also have to be honest with yourself as well.
If you feel like you are trying to convince yourself too much or that he is missing something important to you,then it’s just not meant to be.
Be strong enough to stand up for what you believe in and never settle for anything less than you deserve or want!
You want to be sure you are creating the right foundation when starting a relationship, otherwise dating could end in a disaster or worse, a horrible relationship that is difficult to get out of.
The key is to date confidently. Shyness and especially fear can rear it’s ugly head and ruin what could be a great relationship. Shyness and fear show up in not so apparent ways.
It may be that you continue dating a guy that is not right for you, avoid talking about topics that really matter to you because you are afraid of losing you, or you may feel a lack of confidence that makes it difficult for him to do things for you because you give off an “undeserving” vibe.
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