How To Get A Guy To Ask You Out (Again!)

I know how disheartening it can be to go out on a date with someone and have a good time only for them to be fickle about what they really want or to play games with you until you lose all attraction for them.

I wanted to share with you three simple ways you can make it virtually impossible for him to play games with you and how you can become so irresistible, he can’t help calling you for another date.

First things first, the number one killer for a great date is too much emotion involved. If you have a lot of emotion tied to finding “the one” or having a boyfriend and getting married before a certain age, your efforts at entering into a healthy relationship are already thwarted. It makes it so much more difficult when all your hopes and dreams are riding on your next few dates. You have got to release your need to find “the one” RIGHT NOW and then relax. I’ll be telling you how to make that easier as well.

Do You Have The Right Mindset To Date?

You’ve got to have the right mindset for dating initially. I have been very successful at interviewing in the past and my secret was that I went into the interview not caring what the outcome was either way. I even took it to another level; being more concerned about whether I was going to be interested in the job rather than if the job was interested in me. In my heart, I knew that my credentials were excellent and at some point they would match perfectly with an employer, so interviewing just seemed like a fun time for me to get to know the company to see if our goals matched. Because of that mindset, I have had numerous job offers and a couple of companies even wanted me to sign to be a part of their organization before I even left their office.

It’s the same with dating. Every man you date is not going to be “the one”. You are being open to someone who is kind to you and where your goals match. If you want to be in a monogamous committed relationship then you won’t want to waste precious time continuing to date someone where your goals don’t match. It’s going to be an uphill battle and changing someone is nearly impossible unless they are already on that road.

1. Scheduling Is Everything

This has worked for me time and time again. This strategy is so effective and I use it all the time for business meetings, dates with friends, and even with my husband.

What really makes this strategy fun is that it helps you to put yourself first and prioritize your life. You want to practice filling your calendar. If you already have a lot going on this will be easy, but if you are less busy, practice filling your calendar with the routine things you do daily or weekly. If you workout, put that in your calendar. You enjoy cooking dinner or reading a book, put that there too. Do you have a time when you play with your kids? Add that as well as any doctor’s appointments, scheduled conversations with friends, etc… The point is to fill your calendar so you aren’t available 24/7.

When he asks you out, check your calendar and give him two to three dates that work for you. Try to avoid making them all at night, especially on the weekend. I would give him two dates at first and then one that you may be able to do if you juggle some things around.

One of the things that increases attraction is limited availability of something, and in this case it is you. If you execute this strategy effectively, it’s going to increase his interest and you are becoming irresistible in his eyes.

For this strategy to work well, don’t just make up things, really put yourself first. When you do this it will be authentic and truthful and he will see that he needs to value you as well.

I used this strategy in my last interview and the employer wanted to grab the first time that I had available because they were afraid that if they waited until next week, I would not be available. They ended up presenting me an offer on the spot.

2. Fill Your Funnel

You know how a funnel is large at the top and then gradually allows a smaller amount of liquid to seep through at the bottom?

That’s what needs to happen during dating. Dating is easier to enjoy when you have a few prospects. If you are just going out with ONE person, then everything depends on whether you like him or he likes you.

But if you allow yourself to date several people, not be in a relationship with, but date, you will find that the process is a lot more fun and you are more relaxed and easy going on dates. As you date the person more and more you will be able to determine whether he keeps moving through the funnel or if you need to pour him out.

Also, there’s something about a girl that has options. She becomes more attractive.

3. Be True To Yourself

This may be the most important. You have to be honest and clear about what you want. But you want to be creative in how you disseminate the information. You don’t want to make it seem that you are looking to him specifically to provide everything you want; you are just describing your perfect candidate, whoever it is. You want to get your picture clear so he can see if he is willing to fit in it or not and more importantly so he wants to fit in it.

It’s the same thing that companies do when they tell you about a position. They rarely reveal the annoying parts of the work or things that may not attract the best talent. They keep it positive and appealing.

How can you make your picture appealing? “I’m really just looking for someone that enjoys life like I do that wants to work together to support each other in our goals.” What does your picture look like?

Don’t waver on what you want, this is the part that eliminates the game playing. You don’t always have to tell a man what you want; actions are more powerful than words. If he calls you at 3:00 in the morning, if you answer, you are communicating to him that it is o.k.

Dating is supposed to be fun, but with that you shouldn’t compromise the things you want just to be likable.